Thursday, June 23, 2011

Duke Nukem Forever Review


Today has been long awaited by many Duke Nukem fans. It feels like eons since 3D Realms announced the development of Duke Nukem Forever but today dreams finally came true. In an age when vaporware is seen so often, the final completion of the next round of Duke seemed like a godsend. Unfortunately, fans may not be getting exactly what they dreamed of.



Gameplay
3.0


The first moments of Duke Nukem Forever evoke a feeling of nostalgia that is inescapable. This feeling, however, fades quickly after this first taste.

Poorly executed mechanics gives the game a very unfinished and gritty feeling. Even something as important as aiming feels awkward and flawed. How far can a game go if aiming is broken? On top this is Duke’s, his Ego is essentially his health. Though small at the start of the game, Duke can interact with various object such as weights or pinball machines to improve his ego. This adds another layer of tedious, awkward gameplay that does nothing but waste time. If Duke really needs to look at nudy magazines in-order to increase his ego after saving the earth from alien invasion, then he really shouldn’t be a game’s protagonist.

The game’s gritty feeling and poor mechanics would be forgivable if it weren’t for the horrid loading screen. Upon completing each section, or even simply dying, the play must endure a horrendously long loading screen. With countless cheap and unavoidable deaths, I felt like I spent far more time loading than I spent actually playing. Even installing the game onto the Xbox hard drive ultimately did nothing to ease this.

All of these flaws aside, Duke Nukem Forever brings back all of your favorite weapons from Duke Nukem 3D and all of its classic enemies. If only they felt at all like their predecessors.



Video / Audio
3.5


Even with a quick glance it is easy to see that Duke’s graphics are very sub par to most games released today. Duke Nukem Forever looks like it should have been released years ago. It simply cannot compete with the graphics of today’s FPS’s. Despite it’s unimpressive graphics the game still has a very hard time rendering many effects at once. It lags and tears sometimes with a single explosion in an empty room. You would think that poor graphics would at least mean good performance but, apparently, you’d be wrong.

The voice acting in Duke Nukem Forever is, to put is simply, just terrible. It’s a conglomeration of cheesy one-liners and shameless puns. Oddly enough it somehow feels right with the game and makes for some semi-frequent chuckles.



Story
6.0


The story of Duke Nukem Forever is incredibly simple: Aliens are taking our women, lets kick their asses! The simplicity of the story is matched only by the simplicity of the protagonist. Duke Nukem gives the word “one-dimensional” new meaning and exemplifies one thing: a total bad ass.

This game is obscene, brutal and apologizes for nothing, and honestly, I like that. The story cannot be considered great by any means, but it really is exactly what this game needs.



Content
3.5


The campaign of Duke Nukem Forever is very short, but it somehow didn’t feel short enough. The seemingly perpetual loading screen and constant cheap deaths completely destroy any replay value that Duke may have had. This is unfortunate because the game seems laced with plenty of easter eggs and minigames that I feel no one will have any interest in finding. The game does support multiplayer of up to 8 players, but it’s really something I can’t imagine ever becoming popular.



Huevos Factor
2.0


Duke Nukem Forever offers obscenity galour and plenty of laughs. Despite this, it was a true chore to play through. A good game will leave you wanting more after it’s finished while Duke just left me with a foul taste in my mouth and a feeling of relief that I never had to play it again.

Wave upon wave of cheap deaths followed by ludicrously long loading screens made the game feel nearly unplayable. Even when not trapped in this never ending respawn screen the game feels completely unfinished and unappealing.

Duke Nukem Forever was one of the most highly anticipated games of 2011, but ultimately, I feel it may become known as its worst.



Breakdown:
Gameplay
3.0
Video / Audio
3.5
Story
6.0
Content
3.5
Huevos Factor
2.0

Total
3.5

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